5 Things You Should Do When There’s a Love-Hate Relationship with Your Natural Hair

Help! I Have A Love Hate Relationship With My Hair

So! This winter weather has taken a toll on my hair. It’s dry, it’s shedding and tangling a lot more than usual, and it is also color treated which contributes massively to the dryness. My holy grail products haven’t even worked, and if they supply any moisture, it only lasts for a little while. I have found myself at a fork in the road and I’m about fed up with my natural hair!

If this sounds familiar, you’re probably wondering, well… what should I do? Well, I’m opting for a protective style that keeps my hands out of my hair. But, in these times, I’ve been asked by some about cutting it off OR returning to a relaxer, since the “natural  thing” isn’t working for them.

My suggestions:

1) Never make a decision while frustrated with your hair.  This often leads to regret. If you are considering a relaxer, get your hair straightened by someone who is knowledgeable in natural hair straightening, until you sort through your emotions.  Also, it will feed the desire for straight hair without the permanent stain of chemically treating it.

2) Wear protective styles. There are a variety of protective (salon and diy) that can hold you over until you have gotten through your hair issues. Again, making hasty decisions can leave you with feelings of regret, so wear a style that will buy you time until you have sorted through your feelings and are thinking clearly about the future of your natural tresses.  While wearing them, be sure to moisturize daily. Castor oil mixed with your favorite leave in and diluted with distilled water is a perfect way to moisturize while wearing protective style.

3) Get a trim, but never a hair cut. It has been my experience that when a client gets a haircut while in their feelings about their hair, most times they hate the choice. Getting a trim, will help with the tangling and may decrease anxiety about hair issues by making hair more manageable by ridding it of the bad ends. Read Tell Tale Signs it’s Time For A Trim

SEE ALSO: How Often Should You Trim Your Ends

4) Avoid protein treatments. Though protein treatments plump the strands combating breakage, it tends to leave hair feeling dry. So if you are already experiencing dryness, stay clear of protein treatments and opt for a more moisturizing approach. Prepoo before shampooing, shampoo less often and possibly alternate with cowashing, and double up on deep conditioning; example: instead of once a month, do it twice. If once every two weeks, do it once a week. This will replenish some of the moisture zapped from frigid or ever changing weather.

See also: The Importance of Moisture Protein Balance

5) Keep calm. This may be the hardest suggestion of them all. For many women, if your hair isn’t right, nothing in the universe is right (or at least that’s my take on things lol). But, do not panic when your hair changes. Go with the change. Much like life, when things change you have to rediscover, reassess, and regroup. Out with the old routine and time to explore your hair at the stage it’s in and develop another suitable routine/regimen. Assess and address the new issues.

*side note : as products grow in popularity, they sometimes change the formulas. So what once worked, may no longer work due to ingredient change. So always be aware of what you are using and if something has changed. If so, it may be the cause of your hair problems. Moisturize your hair often or more frequently than previously done. If moisture retention is an issue, try sealing with castor oil or a butter such as Taliah Waajid Nutrient Rich Shine Butter or Jane Carter Solutions Nourish and Shine. I typically apply my sealant after my moisturizer, which seems to work best for my 4b/4c hair type.

Best of Luck to you all on this natural journey!


5 thoughts on “5 Things You Should Do When There’s a Love-Hate Relationship with Your Natural Hair

    1. Markeita Pruitt Post author

      Hi. Hate to hear of your frustration. Try getting a trim and utilizing protective styles. In between times moisturize often and do protein treatments to be sure hair is strengthened for protective styles. If all else fails, visit a local specialist (natural) who can give you a proper regimen based upon hair type and texture. Hope it all improves!


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