Three Instances When Breakage Is Okay (For Me At Least)

Three Instances When Breakage Is Okay (For Me At Least)


As we embark on our natural hair journeys, it’s important to remember that it is just that… a journey. It’s not a destination. It’s a journey.  Too often, in life, we get so focused on our goals that we lose sight of all of the moments that occur in between.  The moments — are what REALLY matter. Life is too short and it moves too fast for us to forget to enjoy the simple pleasures of life. And the same holds true for our hair journeys.

It is no secret that breakage occurs as hair strands are subjected to wear and tear. But wear and tear occurs as we experience life. Of course, we should limit damage to our hair. No one wants to walk around with broken, damaged hair. But the amount of damage you allow depends on your hair goals and your lifestyle. I take good care of my hair, but I also don’t have goals of waist length hair. So, I guess that is why I’m a little lax. Or it could be my daughter’s cancer diagnosis that constantly reminds me how fragile life is. Much more fragile — and important — than hair. So because of that, there are three instance when breakage is okay — at least for me.

Playing in Mommy’s Hair

Little girls love to play in mommy’s hair. They model behavior. It’s what they do. When they grow up, they’ll remember that mommy-daughter time.  Since I have a one-year old and two-year old, I take precautions. No combs. No pulling. [Cue one-year old.] And my girls only play in my hair when it is moisturized and detangled.

Hubby Caressing My Hair

Let’s face it hubbies love to play in our hair. Tender moments can involve scalp massages and strokes of the hair. Of course there are rules. No, he cannot touch my hair if I have somewhere special to go tomorrow. And he wants nothing to do with my hair when I have “Celie” braids in my hair. For the record, the best “caressing hair” is old twistout hair.

Enjoying My Hair

What is the point in growing your hair, if you can’t enjoy your hair? I wear a lot of protective styles, but I also enjoy wearing big, in-yo-face hair. Yes, my hair will likely snag on my coat this winter, but so what?  I’m pretty sure I won’t be able to figure out which strand was snagged five minutes later.

Twenty years from now, I am going  to remember the moments.  The feel of  little fingers rubbing my scalp. And little voices saying, “You look pretty mommy!” The feel of the wind as it blows through my fro. [Yes, our hair blows in the wind too.] And the butterflies I feel when my husband tenderly kisses my forehead and runs his fingers through my hair. Those moments don’t include me sitting in the bathroom with measuring tape to my head. Or me obsessing over a split end. It’s the former moments that I’ll cherish. And  I hope you will too.

Additional Reading

5 Ways Coconut Oil Can Help Prevent Hair Breakage

The Difference Between Breakage and Hair Loss


7 thoughts on “Three Instances When Breakage Is Okay (For Me At Least)

  1. Mmmgood

    Sweet post. Very good way of looking at it. I think it’s so easy as women to get caught up in not messing up our growth progress that we don’t enjoy the naturalness of having our hands or our loved one’s hands in our hair sometimes.

  2. Sharon Jenkins

    Great article. I don’t have goals of waist length hair because the longer my hair gets the more time it takes. I love my protective styles but sometimes I just want my hair the way I want it big and all in your face.

  3. LaToya

    Hey lady! I used to be a follower of yours way back when! Congratulations on the new venture and I am sorry to read about your daughter’s cancer diagnosis…. amen to enjoying your hair EVERY state it’s in though. You and your girl are beautiful.


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