First Impressions: A Husband’s First Reaction to His Wife’s Natural Hair

Alicia James and her husband share how their love was rekindled when she transition from relaxed to natural hair. Enjoy their personal story of love.


Love and Natural HairAlicia James:

I still remember the day when I was standing in front of the bathroom mirror playing in my hair. I was really intrigued with my new curly coily hair. I looked at my husband and told him how weird I thought my hair was. I started to imagine what it would look like without the straight pieces of lifeless hair. I want to tell you that when I stopped getting relaxers, I didn’t know that meant I was going natural. I had no idea that my natural hair was different from my relaxed hair. I was really confused by the changes happening with my hair. I told my husband how I was thinking about cutting off the straight ends to see what my hair would look like. My husband looked at me, gave me that million dollar smile I love, and says, “Go for it!” He says this over and over again.


The finality of it made me a little nervous and I asked him was he sure! Oh, from that look in his eye he was very sure! I whipped the scissors out and yes, I started cutting and chopping away at my hair. When I was done, I was left with a teeny weenie fro.  I stared in the mirror and honestly remembered an overwhelming feeling of relief. I didn’t know it would feel this way, amazing! Then I also started to think what in the world did I just do? I just chopped my hair off. There were so many different emotions going through me, but I liked it! For some strange reason….I knew things were going to be different. I looked over to my husband, and said “So babe, what do you think?”

Kelly James:


Without hesitation I replied “I love it”! I actually did love it, but deep down inside I couldn’t help but to think what was to come. When I met Alicia she didn’t own a pair of tennis shoes and wouldn’t be caught dead without makeup.  I always encouraged her to embrace her natural beauty, relax and enjoy life. Her doing the big chop was a huge step. Before cutting her hair she made several changes and removed many masks that covered her insecurities. My theory is that cutting her hair represented the final mask.


I knew she had either done something that would change her life forever or something she would regret and run to the nearest wig store.  During the upcoming months she went through a rollercoaster of emotions but as her confidence and strength grew so did her hair. I love my wife unconditionally but seeing her grow to love every aspect of herself made me love her even more.


So, what does the love in your life think about your natural hair?


4 thoughts on “First Impressions: A Husband’s First Reaction to His Wife’s Natural Hair

  1. terrim

    Well, I remember when me and my husband first met, I had a perm in my hair had fall out in the middle of my head and had really not grow that long, at this time we we’re just dating. I had gotten very tried of dealing with losing and not being able to grow my hair, for many years I had a perm that had always seems to never work for me. So one day I decided to cut it all off and right then and there I told myself out loud if he don’t like me the way I am now then the hell with him. To my surpise he liked it and this was 11yrs ago and now am really learning to take care of my natural beauitful hair and it has grow so much, I now have this really big afro and wear it proudly, I get alot of stares which I love and so do my husband.

  2. mrsmarieyoung

    Wow how nice! My husband had a very similar reaction. He encouraged me to wear my natural all the time. He said I looked more like woman, in his opinion. I guess with my weaves I looked like a barbie doll. LOL It was actually my weaves that helped my curl pattern return to its natural state, since I wasn’t straightening it every week! Great post 🙂

  3. darin Sibley

    My husband had a fit when I was toward the end of my transition because of all the shrinkage! He literally told me I had disrespected him and did not get his permission to cut my hair! my response to him was that it was my head and I felt like I needed no permission. To this day I do not regret getting rid of my perm. I stand firm that hair does not make a woman and her natural beauty inside out is what counts.


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